Commuting Green

So, as you have noted from my previous posts, the price of gas is on my mind. Very much on my mind. It costs way too much now and I have heard analysts on NPR talk about it getting as high as $7 a gallon. $7!!!! Holy Crap, that is a lot of money.

Currently, I work a 4 day work week, two 12 hour shifts and two 8 hour shifts. The commuter rail schedule to my town is not very good, as I have said on many occasions. On Wednesday and Thursday, my 8 hour days, I take the commuter rail in and home. It leaves the station at 5:43 AM and I get back to the station at 6:30 PM. Gross, but OK. On my late days, I get off at 8:30 PM and the next train home is at 10 something which arrives at 11:45 PM. Hence, my driving two days.

To be more economical, I have been parking at Riverside and taking the Green line into Boston. It is long but OK. But even driving there is 30 miles each way. With gas, toll, parking, wear and tear, that is a lot of money.

I looked at my schedule and the train schedule and believe I can modify my hours on Tuesday to be able to take the 8:20 PM train to be home by 10 PM, saving one round trip worth of gas. That is good, right? But on Fridays, I have to be there until 8:30 PM. There is no changing my schedule. If I were to be good, I would take the train home and be home at midnight. But that makes me so upset and frustrated.

So what should I do, blog friends? Be a good green citizen, conserve gas, keep our costs lower, and take the train every day, even though I will get home at midnight after leaving that morning at 5:43 AM? Do I increase our costs, use fossil fuels and drive in on Fridays, which will get me home between 10 and 11 PM (depending on the Green Line and Red Sox games)? Help me out and give me your opinion.

New Train Schedule + Time Change = Tired Lady

In order to improve on-time service, the MBTA has changed their schedule. What they have done is extend the amount of time the trip is supposed to take rather than improve their ability to arrive a the time they specified. This means my train that used to leave at 6:06 AM leaves at 5:43 AM. Now normally, a 20+ minute change would not be a huge deal except that it is the ass crack of the morning. I have to get up at 4:30 AM to get ready on time. Why so long, you may ask? Because at the ass crack of the morning, even putting on a sock is a huge undertaking. I have to leave the house by 5:30 AM to drive to the station, park, pay my $1 parking, and walk to the train. (Yes, I did say $1 and it is not a typo. Crazy, huh?)

So this was painful enough for a few weeks but then came the time change. Now, 4:30 AM is the old 3:30 AM. I cannot even find my face to put on my glasses, let alone get showered, dressed, and find the car. It is 8 PM and I am considering going to bed now; I am that tired.

@#%$!!!!!

Yesterday morning, I was driving in to work. Things were great; I was listening to Morning Edition (Bob Oaks is the bomb). And suddenly, there was a growing noise from the rear of the car. I was not anywhere near an exit from the Pike. I kept going in hopes of getting off at the Cambridge/Alston tolls. No such luck. The tire blew and started flapping and the steering got wonky. So I pulled over to the right lane as there was no shoulder. I was driving on the rim by then and decided I better stop. My hazards went on the second the tire blew so I hoped and prayed people would see them and get over. It was so scary. Cars came up on me so fast, not slowing down until the last moments. I was so scared for my life and safety. I called AAA immediately and they contacted the State Police who help out on the Pike. Within a few minutes, a man showed up who worked for the towing company that was coming to help me out. He tried flagging traffic away but the drivers were not paying attention. He came back to me and said we had to drive on because someone would get killed. So I drove on the rim to a pull off place. By then, the tow truck had arrived. He changed my tire there with me in the car. It was weird but less scary. However, I was still quite frightened for the tow truck man because cars were whizzing by at 70+ MPH. I was able to call Clementine and tell her I was OK and what had happened. When my car was back in order and the AAA paperwork finished, I drove on into work. I I called Clementine to let her know I was OK, I had stopped at a Starbucks to have diarrhea and a coffee. Lovely. The car was fixed while I was at work to the tune of $158. But I don't care. I had the money in my account and I am alive.

Singing the Blues

Yesterday, I was singing the blues, the commuter blues for real. On my late days, I drive in and park at a subway station. On the drive in, I was trying to stay awake so I drank my coffee and a juice. The subway ride is 30-45 minutes long. About 5 minutes into it, I felt the effects of the coffee and juice in my bladder. But all the stops on the subway there are residential areas. I tried to distract myself by knitting Clementine's Christmas present, but did not work. My urgency to go made me F it up many times which made me have to frog it over and over. Finally, the subway approached stops with restaurants where I knew there were restrooms. I stared at the map and pondered which was the best bet. I settled on waiting one more stop because there's a Starbucks very close to the T and they always have restrooms (except that one in Central Square, bastards). I booked it out of the subway, up the stairs, and over to the Starbucks. Imagine my delight to see the door to the woman's bathroom slightly ajar. No more waiting. Since the store was busy, and since I still had to ride across town to work and did not want to repeat my urgent bathroom seeking, I snuck out without purchasing a drink. I ended up being 10 minutes late but I arrived MUCH HAPPIER than I was early into the subway ride.

Over heard on the train

"Yeah, the train just pulled out of the station. We will be in (the city where I live) in 25 minutes," said a enthusiastic and loud fellow into his cell phone in the seat behind me. "Not hardly," I rudely said under my breath so as not to dash his exuberant belief in the speed of the train. Somewhere, maybe 20 minutes into the ride, he was again loudly speaking on his cell phone. "Yeah, it will be ten more minutes." I laughed quietly to myself. You see, the local train takes about 1 hour and 38 minutes from the station to my city. That man either never looked at a train schedule, lived in a different universe where time and trains move at a very different pace, or is just crazy.

It is all Okey Dokey

Except I don't have much free time to blog, knit, or answer emails.

So being back to work has been OK, good even. I am actually happy to be at work but still so very happy to be a parent. I do love my job and the time away and the changes in me since Hester was born have made me really get back to what I love about it. I am recharged and focused while I am there. I have a different perspective that I am not sure I can quite sum up yet. It helps so much that work is such a nice community of people who all know each other's business. Everyone asks about Hester and asks me how I am doing being back. I get the usual question about how much she is sleeping. It is really nice to work with such a nice group of people. Also, the patients are so very compelling and amazing. I really enjoy working with them and seeing them grow, heal, and smile.

I think one thing working in my benefit as I have resumed working is that I am excellent at compartmentalizing my life. So when I am at work, I am there and not much else exists. When I am home, I am there and work does not exist. I am very appreciative of this skill now.

We have come up with a pretty good feeding schedule, well, schedule of who will do what night feeding. I do the ones the nights that I am at work that way Clementine can sleep and do the early morning one if Hester happens to wake then. I am happy doing it too. I treasure the quiet night feeding, holding Hester, and rocking her to sleep. I don't talk with her much for I am trying to reinforce that night is not a time to wake up and play. So we listen to some music and just look at each other while she eats. These times have become very special to me. Throughout the day today, when I had a moment free, I could feel Hester in my arms from the night before, the weight of her, the warmth of her and her soft blanket, the smell of her, and the sound of her soft coos. These thoughts bring such peace and joy to me.

As the end of my shift rolls around, I feel myself getting excited to come home and be with my family. There is a lightness that has settled into my heart since my little family grew to three. My focus has shifted to more domestic than ever before. This shift feels good to me.

I know that I am more likely to grow weary of my commute and want to find a job near home sooner now that Hester is here. I am OK with that too. So, while I am at work, I am really focused on getting the projects I wanted to accomplish finished and really enjoying the time I am there. I am not going to go anytime soon but within the next five years, I can see myself moving on.

So that is where I am. Hester is waking so I better go. Thanks for checking in on me.

"Head over heels . . . ."

The commuter rail/bus station in the city where Hester is being treated, plays 80's music all the time. The do play the big stars like the GoGos, Dead or Alive, and Culture Club but they also play the more obscure hits and b sides. Any time of the day or night that I am there, it is the 80's. It is awesome and makes me want to dig out my old tapes, dye my hair, and put on my liquid black eye liner!


"All I know is that to me, you don't like your love to burn
Open up your laughing arms, watch out here I come"