15 February, 2006

Massachusetts, my home sweet home!

Lately, the sun is rising earlier and is up for part of my train ride in and out of the city. Sometimes, I watch the landscape slide by and think about how I came to live here in Massachusetts. I am not a native and never planned to live here. I came for a job and did not think I would stay.

When I first came here, MA was like any other state I had lived in, except it was very hard to make friends here. Even joining several groups, professional and recreational, did not help. Despite being an officer in one professional group, I continued to be treated as if I did not exist or was not worth people’s time.

Then, things changed when I met Peaches. She too was a transplant who had thoughts of leaving the state. We quickly fell in love and decided to try to leave the state. Our plans never worked out so we stayed. We moved in together and started making a home together here in MA. In 2001, we were “married” in our church with our friends and family. Massachusetts became even more of a home to me.

The next big change happened November 2003 when the Supreme Judicial Court of Massachusetts issued the Goodridge Decision. We went to all the rallies and protests we could in the time leading up to May 17, 2004. I heard speakers talk of liberty and freedom. I saw lawmakers, straight and gay, standing up and saying gay marriage is a civil rights issue and to be against it is just as wrong as those who were against equal educational access and interracial marriage. I heard passionate speeches from individuals whose families had been enslaved, saying to bar same-sex marriage is a violation of civil rights, and similar to the violations their families had endured. Massachusetts became very cool.

On May 17, 2004, Peaches and I were married. The night before, we went to Cambridge City Hall and were the 215th same-sex couple to sign the paperwork to be married. Never in my life did I ever think I would see so many people (thousands upon thousands) cheering for my right to marry my wife. Now, we are married and currently can only stay married in this state. This is our home.

When we bought our own home here a year and a half ago, it helped to solidify that MA is were I belong. We have neighbors who chat with us over the fence, snow blow our sidewalk, and bring over clams casino. Being an apartment dweller for almost 20 years, being a home owner now makes this state even more of a home.

Our battles are not done yet with equality. I am currently involved in a civil rights case, fighting to be treated the same as heterosexual couples. It will be years before it is decided. I will not stand to be treated differently in my home.

So I stare out the window at the landscape that once was so unfamiliar and unwelcoming. It is no longer is unfamiliar, not only from the many years of looking at it but also because my wife and I have found a community that believes in the words that “All men are created equal” and include me in it. I have stood in the state house and in the court, demanding my equality. I have made Massachusetts my home.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

This makes my chest hurt. I heart you guys.

Clementine said...

What a lovely post, Hashbrown! I love our little home and the life we've made together.

Hashbrown said...

Oh you gals,
Jenny, LYLAS DNQ and AJWP, you are my homeslice!

Psycho Kitty said...

oh, just
xo